Feeling unsure about yourself? You’re not alone. Low self-esteem can happen to anyone, but as a teenager, it can hit especially hard. With all the changes and pressures you’re dealing with—whether it’s school, friends, family, or social media—it’s easy to start doubting yourself. But here’s the good news: understanding low self-esteem is the first step to feeling more confident and sure of who you are. Our teen mental health treatment is here to help.
What Exactly Is Self-Esteem?
Self-esteem is basically how you see and feel about yourself. If you have low self-esteem, you might feel like you’re not good enough or that you don’t measure up to others. These feelings can come from lots of places, and recognizing them is the first step to turning things around.
Reasons You Might Feel This Way
There are many things that can contribute to low self-esteem. Here are some of the common causes teens face:
Social Media and Comparisons
Raise your hand if you’ve scrolled through Instagram or TikTok and thought, Why don’t I look like that? or Their life seems perfect. It’s normal to compare yourself to others when you’re surrounded by highlights of their lives. But remember, those “perfect” photos and videos are totally filtered and posed—they’re not the full picture.
Negative Self-Talk
Ever catch yourself thinking things like, I’m such a loser or I’m just going to mess this up? That’s called negative self-talk, and it’s like having a bully living in your head. The more you think these things, the more they can knock your confidence.
Family Stuff
Your family plays a big part in how you feel about yourself. Maybe you’ve dealt with lots of criticism or felt pressure to be “perfect” at home. Changes or issues in the family, like divorce or financial struggles, can also make you feel insecure.
Bullying or Past Hurts
If someone has treated you poorly—whether it’s a bully at school, a toxic friend, or bullying online—it can leave scars on how you see yourself.
Figuring Out Who You Are
Being a teen is all about figuring out your identity, and that’s not always easy. Whether you’re sorting through questions about who you want to be or struggling with things like your gender identity or cultural background, it can feel overwhelming.
School or Activity Pressure
If you feel like you always have to get straight A’s or win every game, it can be exhausting. Not achieving your goals—or feeling like you’re falling short—can leave you feeling like you’re not good enough, even when that’s far from true.
How Low Self-Esteem Might Look in Your Life
Sometimes, you might not even realize low self-esteem is the issue. It doesn’t always come out as saying, I hate myself. Instead, it might show up like this:
- Avoiding social situations or worrying people will judge you.
- Being extra hard on yourself, even over small mistakes.
- Pretending everything is fine but secretly feeling really down.
- Taking unnecessary risks or making bad decisions, just to get people’s attention.
Not everyone shows it in the same way, and that’s OK. What matters is figuring out what’s going on and what you can do about it.
How to Start Building Your Self-Esteem
The awesome thing about self-esteem? You have the power to improve it. It takes time, but with some effort, things can get a lot better. Here are a few ways to start building up your confidence:
Be Kinder to Yourself
Think about how you’d treat a close friend or someone you care about. When you mess up, you probably wouldn’t say, Wow, you’re such a failure. You’d tell them, It’s OK, you’ll do better next time. Try talking to yourself the same way.
Set Small, Reachable Goals
Big achievements don’t happen overnight. Break things down into smaller steps and celebrate when you accomplish them. Getting an 80% on a hard math test or making one new friend is still a win!
Take Breaks from Social Media
Sometimes, the best thing you can do for your mental health is put down your phone. Limit how much time you spend scrolling, and unfollow people or accounts that make you feel bad about yourself.
Focus on Your Strengths
What are you good at? Maybe it’s art, making people laugh, listening, or being creative. Remind yourself of these qualities and know they matter just as much as anyone else’s talents.
Surround Yourself With Supporters
Spend time with people who make you feel good about yourself. Real friends build you up—they don’t bring you down. If you’re not sure where to turn, talk to a teacher, counselor, or family member you trust.
Find Ways to Express Yourself
Whether it’s journaling, playing sports, drawing, or practicing guitar, having an outlet where you can work through your feelings is super helpful. It’s a way to boost your mood and remind yourself of your abilities.
Ask For Help If You Need It
If you’re feeling stuck or like things aren’t getting better, there’s no shame in reaching out to a therapist or counselor. They’re there to help and can give you tools to understand yourself better.
Call MCAW Today to Enhance Your Self-Esteem
Having low self-esteem doesn’t mean you’re broken or that something’s wrong with you—it’s just a bump in the road. By taking small steps, surrounding yourself with positive influences, and being patient with yourself, you can build the confidence you deserve.
If you’re ready to take action but don’t know where to begin, it’s OK to ask for help. Call us at 855.940.6229 today or contact us online. People care about you, and there’s support out there to guide you. Little by little, you’ll start feeling stronger, like the best version of you. You’ve got this!
